Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
