Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Randomize
