If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
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No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
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I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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