she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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