that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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