Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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