Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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