What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
