Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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