After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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