I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
