Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..