i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
