Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
