What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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