walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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