How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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