She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize