The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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