I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
