I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
No subtext here. People are naked.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
