so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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