He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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