It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize