Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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