Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
