i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
