Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Randomize
