I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
