Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
you had me at cake vodka
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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