So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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