i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
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You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
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She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
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