I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
