He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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