Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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