just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
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He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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