i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
accomplished twins. life is a go
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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