paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
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