should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I could fuck to npr.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize