I don't usually arrange sex via text message
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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