Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.