also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
