We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
