his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
He has the fingertips of a God
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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