I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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