I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
