i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
