ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
