New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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