You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize