new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Operation Purity has been aborted
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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