I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
